After having a break from an eight year marriage, I was faced with the decision to either practice Tantra here in the UK (London to be more precise) or fly to the south east. The far east was my first choice with the promise of leaving behind the past and to retreat in the sun by the sea which did not seem like and still to this very moment not the worst plan to date, so I have spent a few weeks in London attending various workshops, group therapy where the dynamic has facilitated the spontaneous exchange and expression of long-buried feelings through the use of bodywork and movement therapy using touch, massage, bioenergetics exercises to help release stored emotions in internal pathways, for maximum flow by shifting internal chemicals to attain natural balance. This is why the principles of Tantra and the teachings have attracted me. In addition Tantra helps develop the masculine and embody the divine feminine goddess with these polarities undeveloped from childhood.
So after eight years, I have been able to reflect and see why the relationship failed and why many others do. We are all experiencing similar experiences with a slightly different cause, but I will delve into this personal experience at a later date, as I will have to back track. But now I want to address and recognize where I am and what I need to confront, and I will be sharing this part of my journey with you.
I recently attended an introductory workshop to Tantra with Mal, the founder of Tantric Journey. The information shared and communicated in the workshop resonated with the teachings I have previously come to accept through my own fortunate experiences and teachings. Therefore, my intention for visiting was to gain further insight on the training one must complete or ashrams one is required to attend as I am embarking on my very own journey, and have the desire to practice and facilitate for the sole purpose of universal consciousness. Though i am not fond of labels, I feel I would fit the role of a Dakini well encompassing my own creativity.
After the workshop I found myself asking these questions and due to my honest nature I attempted to communicate the reasons/my past experiences that led me to this workshop, and ask these questions to begin with. After reflecting on my marriage and discovering the reasons for the friction and conflict I feel, it is my duty to share with you in the hope that if you too are confronted with a similar situation, it is better to begin the initialisation of oneself before coming together in a sacred union.
So after my personal experiences with my teacher, an opportunity presented itself. Mal the founder of Tantric Journey suggested I would gain further insight into the practice in exchange for keeping a journal and taking notes of my journey hereon-in to contribute to others who find themselves treading this path. Initially I was taken aback as my teacher was willing to share with me these teachings without much or any expectation! I still find this difficult to digest as nowadays society will not do so but without further deliberation I got to experience my first encounter with Mal and more importantly with myself!
As an individual I am fairly open minded. My father always questioned the society and has challenged me to ask similar questions. I have suppressed many emotions since childhood and have buried them for some time now, and as a result destroyed many meaningful relationships and will continue to if I choose not to recognize and accept. I shared most of this with my teacher and he was extremely receptive, and I too will facilitate this through my own creative experience.